DAY 25 - Watch What You Say!

WHAT UP EVERYBODY!!! I'm Baaaack! LOL

Quickly, I have ben asked how have I been doing, numerous times in the past 48 hours. I kept saying, "I'm ok." Or "I'm stuck." Or "I'm numb." Then today it hit me....I have actually been feeling stuck and numb. Melancholy. Just kinda moving thru life with no ups and no downs. Just kinda going with the flow. Then it hit me. I am in control of this. Of how I am feeling. I talked myself into feeling melancholy. Well now I am going to talk myself out of it!
This morning when I got up, I thanked God for allowing me another day, then I was trying to pray, but I was too tired. I figured I needed a boost. So I grabbed a DVD so I could hear some praise and worship and get me hyped up to pray and start my day. Well, the DVD that I grabbed was entitled: What You Say is What You Get (Creflo Dollar Ministries, 4/23/08)
The message was great! It was a practical breakdown using the scripture about how what we say shapes our destiny! From the simplest things to the largest, the words that come out of our mouth are extremely powerful.
One of the things he mentioned was, "Don't say what you feel. Your feelings shouldn't determine your words. Your words should determine your feelings."
That's when I realized that I had been making myself feel down, cause I kept saying it. So I immediately changed up my responses to whoever asked(I was on facebook earlier too).
So, go ahead and ask me how I'm feeling today! LOL

Here are the scriptures he listed during the sermon:

Mark 11:20-23 (Amplified Bible)
20In the morning, when they were passing along, they noticed that the fig tree was withered [completely] away to its roots.
21And Peter remembered and said to Him, Master, look! The fig tree which You doomed has withered away!
22And Jesus, replying, said to them, Have faith in God [constantly].
23Truly I tell you, whoever says to this mountain, Be lifted up and thrown into the sea! and does not doubt at all in his heart but believes that what he says will take place, it will be done for him

Proverbs 21:23 (Amplified Bible)
23He who guards his mouth and his tongue keeps himself from troubles.

Matthew 12:36-37 (Amplified Bible)
36But I tell you, on the day of judgment men will have to give account for every idle (inoperative, nonworking) word they speak.
37For by your words you will be justified and acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned and sentenced.

Malachi 2:17 (Amplified Bible)
17You have wearied the Lord with your words. Yet you say, In what way have we wearied Him? [You do it when by your actions] you say, Everyone who does evil is good in the sight of the Lord and He delights in them. Or [by asking], Where is the God of justice?

Malachi 3:13 (Amplified Bible)
13Your words have been strong and hard against Me, says the Lord. Yet you say, What have we spoken against You?

TODAY'S MEDITATION
Proverbs 18:21 (Amplified Bible)
21Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and they who indulge in it shall eat the fruit of it [for death or life].

SUGGESTION
For Lent, lets give up negative confessions and words; about ourselves, about others, and a about our situations. 40 days of speaking positivity!
(its going to be hard, but we can do it. Just pay extra special attention to what you are ABOUT to say)

TODAY'S GOALS
Speak positively about my feelings and emotions today. I am going to chart my own course! I am going to have a great day on purpose!
who's coming with me!!!! hahahahahahahaha

CHALLENGES/DISTRACTIONS
I know I will be challenged to react to somethings. Things will rise up against us as soon as we commit to being positive. Just be prepared, and laugh when they happen, cause WE WIN! Be slow to speak today ya'll.

SONG OF THE DAY
I had to share this song with you guys. I started to put it up last night, but I figured I would wait because I didn't want to put two songs up back to back. I was driving home last night when I heard this, and it had me singing and slapping my knee! It made me feel a lot better personally, and I also wanted to switch up the flavor.
"You are my joy" Another Ty Tribbett song. What can I say, the man is great at what he does!
I guarantee you're gonna be feeling ten times better at the end of this song! I want to hear your comments.

DAY 24-NUMB

In the midst of me finding out that my homeboy passed away, I also found out that my uncle was beaten and robbed in his home out here in Atl. he is my fathers brother, and all of my other aunts and uncles are taking turns coming out here to help take care of him. My father should be coming down next week too, so its bitter sweet.
I don't have too much to say at the moment. My head is kinda cloudy. I ate already, but I still feel hungry. I slept late today, but I am still kinda sleepy. Just one of those days. Iam not real sad or anything. Just numb. I've had great conversations the past two days though.....that has kept me up. I think I just need some rest. I will probably post something a little later.
I want to take a vacation....WHO'S COMING WITH ME!!!!!!???????

SONG OF THE DAY
Melodic, hyptnotizing, powerful, joyus, captivating, engulfing, encouraging, energizing! " Just Worship" - by Dave Hollister. I suggest you just close your eyes and listen all the way until the end of the song....

DAY 23

SHELDON RIPPY #10-REST IN PEACE MY BROTHER

Ok. So I found out that I lost a friend to cancer this weekend. His name was Sheldon Rippy, but we all called him RIP. I thought it was earlier today, but I found out that it was Saturday. I sent an email out to all of our mutual friends from high school. Then I went to Facebook and in my status I wrote:

Corey lost a teammate, a friend, a brother recently...I miss you RIP!

Immediately after I hit enter, I put my head down and took a deep breath. At that instant I get a text message from Tamia, it read:

How are you 2day...is there anything u would like me 2 pray 4?

I came straight to the blog! Then, no more than a minute later I got a call form my man Russ, who started a website dedicated to an area in the Bronx where we all grew up. I looked at the phone, and to be honest, I said to myself, I really don't feel like talking. But then I said, he probably has some good news for me, and he did. He told me to send him a picture of RIP so he can post it on his website. There are almost 3000 people who are on his site, so I am sure someone will see it and get the info.

THANK YOU TAMIA AND RUSS....THANK YOU GOD for hooking it up.

I am kinda numb right now. He was 37 years old. Rip was funny, cool, laid back, sneaky, tall and skinny (like me), unselfish, and a real people person. He made everyone around him comfortable. I wrote one of my funniest memories of Rip on a facebook note dedicated to him, I'd like to share it:

I remember in football camp, Rip and I were partners in doing some tackling drills. We saw Mel knocking dudes heads off, and Rector making examples of the rookies. I remember he and I were like, "FORGET THAT! I won't hit YOU that hard, and you don't hit ME that hard!" LMAO!!!!!! We were half stepping throughout the drill, and our football coach caught on to us, and made us switch partners. I think Mel smashed Rip one good time...LOL . He took forever trying to get up. He was MAAAAAAAAAD!!!! LOL

Pray for Rips family please. He was definately too young to go!

DAY 22 - Connecting the Dots

Today has been an awesome day! I have been in front of the computer for about 10 hours off and on. It started late last night. I went on Facebook to check if I had any messages. Then I had two people hit me with an instant message. One was an old friend from college, and the other was a family member. Real quickly, here is the deal:
The one from college and I had a falling out, or so I thought, about 17 years ago. Hadn't spoken since. Then they hit me up on myspace, and it was all love. They said, we had no beef, we were cool. So I was like, what the heck am I holding on to???? Anyway, upon conversing, we realized we had a lot in common. Then they shared something real personal. They had been dealing with a non-curable disease.-diabetes.
They expressed that their son had it as well. It was draining and taxing on them physically and emotionally. Well, you know me, I offered to add them to my prayer list...and they accepted. They were very appreciative of the offer. I didn't know it yet, but there WAS a reason for us to talk at this particular time.
My family member hit me up to say that they were really proud of me for doing the blog. They had expressed that they had wanted to have a closer relationship with God, and really wanted to reconnect. I let them know that if they ever wanted to talk, I was here. They actually said that they just wanted to skip talking to a man and just have a one on one with GOD! It also came out in our conversation, that they were not comfortable talking to me. I had not been the easiest guy to talk to in the past. I was standoffish and mean. I agreed. I told them that was the Old Corey. I could tell that they had something troubling them, but I didn't push the issue, I just answered their questions. I suggested a church in their town that they could go to, and immediately they were on that Church's website. I could tell that they were hungry for Change! They came here to the blog, and read each day from day 3 on, asking me questions along the way. It was a fun journey. To make a long story short, I was able to talk to them about how to heal relationships. Lord knows, I've messed up my fair share of them. LOL. I thank God for changing me so I was able to talk to them, and meet them right where they are at. I was able to give examples of what I did and how I fixed things. It really helped them. I am looking forward to continuing our conversation.
Earlier this evening, I spoke to another old friend. This friend, I have known since the 7th grade! During our conversation it came out that they had Lupus. THE LIGHT BULB WENT OFF. Several months earlier, I had met someone through an older blog that I had created. They had shared with me that they had Lupus. Just before then, I had another friend tell me that their cousin was dying of AIDS and they wanted to do a documentary on them. Then I remembered my daughters mother telling me I needed to do a documentary on how our daughter deals with sickle-cell anemia. Then one night, while Azia and I were talking, she muttered out, "Sickle-Cell is WACK!!!"
I thought right then and there, that would be the title to my documentary-Sickle-Cell is Wack!
Then I thought that I was going to do a documentary on all the people and situations that I just mentioned. Well, to make a long story short, it sparked me to continue with that project. I will be making modifications to that DVD idea, but you will soon see the results!
THANK YOU GOD! I AM going to help somebody!!!!!!!!!!

TODAY'S GOALS
My goals today are to finish some projects. I promised some people I would email them pictures, I have to edit some things, and do some house cleaning. I have read my early scriptures, so I'll be reading my evening scriptures shortly.

TODAY'S MEDITATION
Today, I am just focused on finishing what I start. Real simple. I think I will look for a scripture to support that.....maybe ya'll can help me on that one. Find a scripture to support that.

YESTERDAY'S SUMMARY
Sunday was great. Church was off the chain. My man Russ came with me to church! Thank You Russ! I took some Corey time out and went downtown and took some pictures with my partner. It was a great day!

CHALLENGES/DISTRACTIONS
Sometimes we can be our biggest distraction. Yesterday, I just got out of the way and enjoyed myself. I thought I was tired, but NOPE. God sustained me until about 4am this morning.

BUILD -BREAK-BUILD
I am able to see a CHANGE in me!
I still procrastinate, just a little...but getting much better.
I heard from HIM today-and I will OBEY!

SONG OF THE DAY
I slipped on yesterday and didn't put up a song cause I was in deep conversation, so I will put two up today:
First song is "Let It Rise" by William Murphy. This song always reminds me of a time when my family from NY came down to celebrate our aunts 80th birthday. We gave her a surprise birthday party Saturday night, then almost my whole family came to church with me on Sunday morning! It was a special day for me and my family....and I just wanted to make sure I shared it with my blog family! This song represents FAMILY!
Second song is one of those slept on songs. "Tell Him" by Lauryn Hill is an ode to 1 Corinthians 13 - the Love chapter. It sounds like an R&B love song, but pay CLOSE attention to the lyrics. This is a POWERFUL piece!

DAY 21 - I HEAR YOU

So now that I have heard from GOD directly (see DAY 6), I am really looking forward to Him speaking to me again....directing my path again...giving me specific instructions. I have been so stuck on trying to hear from Him, I almost didn't hear You!
I am in constant communication with alot of you, and at one time or another, you've said how much the blog has blessed you. How you've shared personal things with strangers. The ironic part is that someone on this blog has been going thru a similar situation as you at the exact same time. You guys have trusted me and the other family members with your hearts, your fears, your triumphs, your defeats, and your joy's! We've celebrated, laughed, and cried together! Its only been 21 days!!!!!!!!!!
I have heard of people recognizing issues and challenges, and then being brave enough to face them. I hear people excited about overcoming adversity. I hear people saying THANK YOU. I hear people asking for HELP and getting it. This is soooo much bigger than one mans personal journey to get closer to GOD. It's about all of us. I got a text today that said I inspired them to read their bible. Do you know how much that touched me? I have gotten emails, and phone messages from people telling me that they look forward to reading the blog everyday, even thought they don't post any comments. I HEAR YOU.
I hear you Lord, speaking through these people. I hear the CONFIRMATIONS through these people. When I felt alone and abandoned by the people who I thought would stick to me closer that a glove, you sent someone to tell me what a great job the blog was doing in their lives! I HEAR YOU. When someone asked for prayer for a small child, we heard, and obeyed, and got immediate results! I HEAR YOU. When someones child had a unique disease, you put someone in their path who has been through it or going through it in their path to help comfort that parent and give advice. I HEAR YOU. When someone said they were going to go to church every Sunday, you sent someone in their path that said," I'm gonna go to church with you!" When someone is hurting from the loss of a loved one, you put interceders within arms reach for them. Prayer warriors who's heart goes out to the hurting, and who took it upon themselves to remind the hurt that we are with you, you have support! I HEARD THAT TOO. I hear people losing the word TRY from their vocabulary! I hear positive affirmations. I hear people saying what they ARE and not what they USED to be! I hear you LORD when you say WE WIN!!!!!!

TODAY'S GOALS
Today my goal was simple, just make it to church! I have a hard time sleeping on Saturday nights and I knew that getting up in the morning was going to be tough. God is so good though. He woke me up without the alarm clock this morning. Renewed my strength...gave me so much energy, I ran around all day!

TODAY'S MEDIATION
I am just curious....I know God is no respecter of person, so what has HE been saying to you? Yesterday, I asked-God is that You? And HE told me today that HE has never stopped talking to me! HA!!!!! PRAISE GOD YA'LL!!!!
What has HE been saying to you through other people? Directly to you? Just take a minute and focus......Then please feel free to share it in the comments section!

YESTERDAY'S SUMMARY
Yesterday was a good day over all. I got more praying done yesterday than I usually do. It just kicks in every time I get into my car now. Its on automatic. I did get a few more prayer request, and I'll be adding them tonight.

CHALLENGES/DISTRACTION
Yesterday, I wrote that I new there were going to be challenges to my day, I was right. I had to have a heart to heart with someone, and it wasn't easy. I wasn't trying to hurt their feelings, but I had to be honest. I used to hold back how I felt for fear of hurting their feelings, but sparing their feelings left me kinda numb. So I was able to communicate exactly how I felt, and I believe it was received well.

BUILD-BREAK-BUILD
I am very much more aware of the presence of GOD.
I can get better with my language. When I get mad, I curse. I am working on it.
(UGH! There, I said it!)
I was able to council a friend and then have it confirmed through her reading-It was on point!

SONG OF THE DAY
(TBD)

DAY 20 - God... Is That You?

man...this is tough. I have been praying for some answers in my personal life, and I believe I got the answer today. Now all I have to do is obey. Easier said than done. How many times have we heard from GOD and didn't listen or obey? What did we miss? What was he trying to get to us? I guess I need to add this to my fear list. LOL. I need to overcome this fear, and quickly! I know that I am going to listen to HIM. I have to. I was reminded last night that no matter what I have to do or decisions I have to make, I am strong enough now to make them! AMEN. I am stronger now. I am wiser now. I am closer to GOD.

TODAY'S GOALS
Today I plan on taking the day off from the world. I am going to stay in the house, watch a couple of movies, listen to some gospel, pray...just have conversations with GOD. I am going to try to not get upset about anything. I can tell you right now, every time I decide to spend quality time with GOD, distraction comes. I am not going to fall for it this time. I am going to laugh and smile in the face of any adversity, trouble or challenge!
I have read my early scriptures today. Just gotta make sure I read the evening scriptures. I just read Mark Chapter 4. In this chapter Jesus breaks down how the Kingdom of God works. I encourage you to take time out and read it. It was good.

TODAY'S MEDITATION
GOD IS THAT YOU? I am going to focus in on hearing from HIM. I am going to make sure I get a confirmation this weekend that I did hear instructions on what I need to do next, and that it was not my emotions playing trick on me.

YESTERDAY'S SUMMARY
Yesterday, I was overwhelmed with compassion. I found out that my friends are hurting! I wanted to run to each of them and take away the pain. I just found out that one of my high
school partners has Terminal Throat Cancer. I had been looking for him for about 2 years now, and no one knew where he was. he is in Vegas now, but there is no way I can get in contact with him, yet. Then there were other people, closer to my circle , who are just going through some things. Things that's been revealed to them since joining the blog. So yesterday, I just had to stay in prayer as much as possible. I had all of you on my mind all day long! Believe me, you are covered.

CHALLENGES/DISTRACTIONS
Yesterday, I had no distractions really. I made sure I put everyone else in the forefront and prayed for them. Today is a whole different story thoguh. LOL to be continued.

SONG OF THE DAY
If I can find a song that fits my mood or todays post, I will surely add it. I can't even hear music right now.....this is different. Actually, I do hear a song..I need to go listen to it. BRB
Ok, i'm back!
"Imagine Me" by Kirk Franklin is a song that made me reflect on my journey. Think about how far we have all come from where we used to be....

DAY 19 - PRAY

This has been a very difficult week. I have recieved calls, texts, and emails asking for prayer. Prayer for a freind, family member, themselves....PRAYER!
I would like to take this time to ask that who ever is reding this blog, member, follower, passer by. If you need prayer or know someone who needs prayer, please leave it in the comments section today! Let put them all in one location, and intercede (pray for) one another.
you can get as detailed as you like.

TODAY'S GOALS
I am going to pray for everyone who leaves a prayer comment!

TODAY'S MEDITATION
The Power of Prayer!
I believe that one way to get your prayers answered is to pray for someone else in the same situation. So, with that being said, we need to make our situations known. I guarantee that there are people here who are going through the same exact thing. I hear it all the time! Keep in mind that whatever you are going thru, its not about you. Its about someone else. GOOD AND BAD. Our prayer list are gonna grow by leaps and bounds today....but on the flip side, our blessing will be growing as well. Say a heartfelt prayer for your brother and sisters today ya'll/ Especially for your enemies!!!!!!

DAY 18 - I'M IN LOVE...

YEAH, I SAID IT! I AM IN LOVE.

I am in LOVE with the fact that God has me on this exciting, wonderful, eye-opening journey!
I am in LOVE with the fact that it is drawing some of my family members closer. And speaking of family members, I am in LOVE with the fact that this blog represents a family of believer's doers, & seekers, from different area's and backgrounds.....but we still call each other the BLOG FAMILY, and that we pray for each other. That we are concerned about each other. That we look for each others comments. That we check on one another. I am in LOVE with the fact that I got up this morning, and the first thing out of my mouth was, "THANK YOU GOD!!". I thanked HIM for giving me another opportunity to get this thing right. I am in LOVE with life.
I am specifically happy because we have a new member....my younger sister, Keri. I sent her the web address to the blog a few days ago, and last night at about 2am, she texted me talking about the blog. Then this afternoon, she texted me to find out if I posted anything yet. :O)
She and I have been having differences in philosophy's over the past year or so. She just turned 21 and is in a transition period in her life where she is discovering what it is to be an adult. I hope this helps Keri! The training wheels are off...LOL.

TODAY'S GOALS
My goals for today/tonight are:
-read my scriptures
-pray out loud for 20 minutes!
-outline my next 9 days (meaning, give myself a deadline on unfinished things)

TODAY'S MEDITATION
I was watching a DVD of church service , and the Pastor was asking, "What is your first response when you get bad news?" He was saying, (and I am paraphrasing), a CHRISTIANS first response should be to run to the WORD of GOD to find all of the scriptures pertaining to that subject. Pick out the ones they feel are appropriate, and say them everyday until in gets on the inside of you...and become a part of you. THAT'S how you change things! This doesn't only pertain to bad news. This principal can be used for anything. Go to the WORD and find out if it lines up with GOD. Then do what it tells you to do. Easier said than done????? My meditation has been, "What have I NOT asked GOD for? What have I NOT seeked HIS advice on?" AND WHY?
I am seeing what my biggest Achilles heel in my walk is...its my prioritizing quiet time with GOD. I need to get more familiar with HIS promises, teachings, etc.
I ask you to examine yourselves. Are there any part of your life that you haven't let GOD into?
Let's let HIM in and see what happens!

YESTERDAY'S SUMMARY
Yesterday was a decent day. I didn't get all of my goals accomplished, but they were at the forefront in my mind. LOL. I am doubling up today.

CHALLENGES/DISTRACTIONS
I was distracted by my old habits. Turning on the TV and getting lost. I had it under control for a minute, but recently, I've found myself paying more attention to sports than my walk. I will not be writing this again!

BUILD-BREAK-BUILD
-I am recognizing that I have come very far in my walk, and I am happy!
-I need to be more diligent about the things that I want.
-I got my sister to the blog.

SONG OF THE DAY
" THE LOVE SONG"-by Canton Jones
Self explanatory!

DAY 17- Adjusting the Compass

Ok, so before you read this post, if you haven't already, please scroll down and read DAY 16 first. I posted them both on the same day. DAY 16 will give you insight on where I am going...this is a continuation. THANKS.

THOUGHTS: Adjusting the Compass
Earlier, I failed to mention that I awoke to a text message today that said," I went to check the blog and you haven't made an entry. DAY 17?"
( I think they meant day 16, but anyway)
"...I do look forward to the daily update. Go back and read day 1, it helps. I read it."

Well, I went back and read day 1! I am going to try and stick with a format on here. I believe the format was helping me stay on track. You'll see what I am saying because the format wil be in BOLD type. Just a way for me to stay focussed, and be accountable.

I have some thoughts/questions about when we miss the mark or fall short of ......
wow. I was gonna write, fall short of being perfect. Then I saw it - none of us are perfect! HA! I get it. THANK YOU LORD.
I had this big speech in my head I was gonna call the WHAT IF's....what if I got drunk, what if I smoked weed, what if I fornicated, what if I lied...does it stop my walk? I know before, when I would mess up. I would take a few days to get my " head right"...LOL Code name for - keep sinning. Then feel guilty and work my way back down the ailse on Sunday. Or silently re-dedicate in my seat. So I began to apply the WHAT IF's to my blog. Like, because I didn't post yesterday....I started to feel guilty. What if because I failed to be obedient with the blog, HE is going to make me start all over. What if I said or did something that wasn't the right thing to do or say? WOW. I really went in on myself. Kinda beat myself up, but at the same time, looking for an outlet....an escape clause.
So when I began to write, and I realized that I am not going to be perfect, it was like a weight lifted off of me. I was concerned that God would be displeased with me because I messed up. But I see now that he was just showing me HOW & WHY I messed up, so I can get it right the next time the Holy Spirit tried to correct me. I remember praying for that UNCTION for correction by the Holy Spirit a few days ago, I posted that prayer. Now I have what I prayed or HALLELULIAH! God new I wasn't going to be perfect. However, he is perfecting me through my imperfections!
PRAISE GOD!
HA....re-read that ya'll!!!!!!

TODAY'S MEDITATION
God is Perfecting me through my Imperfections!
I challenge you to say that out loud 3 times!!!!!

TODAY'S GOALS
-Read my early scriptures by 3pm today.
-Read my evening scriptures by 10pm tonight.
-Return those emails I've been putting off.
-Pray out loud for 15 minutes
-Apply for 2 jobs on line(gotta start with small, attainable goals)
-Go to bible study
-Do 15 push-up! (I know ya'll ain't laughing)

YESTERDAY'S SUMMARY
I will categorize yesterday as a great learning experience. I learned that I must be obedient to the Holy Spirit. I also learned that everyday gives me the opportunity to learn something new. Thank You for another day to get it right LORD!

CHALLENGES/DISTRACTIONS
-I must get laziness out of my life.
- Watch what I say-I have been overcommitting myself to make sure everyone else is happy, huge distraction.

BUILD-BREAK-BUILD
BUILD-State something positive about yourself. BREAK- State something that you can do better at. BUILD-Finish strong with another posotive affirmation.

I am a great listener. I can be better at reading my bible. I am really going to get my walk right!

SONG OF THE DAY
This song isn't meant to bring anyone down, so I hope that it doesn't make anyone sad! I found it encouraging. We gotta stay in the fight ya'll.......When times get hard, hold on...finish the race.
"What Do You Do" - by Dave Hollister answered my delima. I pray it helps!

DAY 16 - The Snowball Effect!!!!!!!

What up blog family! Ok, so I will just jump right in on this one. DAY 16-February 17, 2009, I didn't post anything (obviously). As I sit here and try to think of a valid excuse to support my neglegence, I can't come up with anything. LOL. You know how we do...try to take the blame off of us. LOL
Well, upon reflection of yesterday, I realized that the Holy Spirit was trying to get my attention all day. It started off in the morning. When it was time to read my scriptures, I couldn't really focus. I kept hearing him say, read your scriptures. Turn off the TV. Get up. Your bible is right there. But I wasn't listening. I kept putting it off. I kept thinking, I will in a minute. Minutes turned to hours. Then, when I finally MADE MYSELF read, I wasn't really there. I forced it, but I couldn't tell you any details about what I read. I got frustrated, and put down the bible. I am sharing this, because I know I am not the only one who's been here.
The longer it took for me to get up and do something productive, the lazier I became. It was like my energy was zapped. Needless to say, everything that I was supposed to do, or was reminded to do, was put off for LATER. Until I ran out of later. The day was gone. It was Wednesday, Feb. 18, 2009 and I had failed to post in my blog. The key word there is MY blog. I have noone else to blame. I just felt like not doing anything. I realized that This IS Where IT Begins. My stumbling block. This is the turning point or the wall that I face within my self, or within my Christian walk. I see it now. I really thought that the bigger sins were the ones that messed me up! It's actually, the little things that I fail to build on throughout the day that leads me to my destination. I just didn't GET HERE. I plotted the course earlier that day by being lazy......not sticking to what I intended on doing. Then POOF, the day was gone. The "SNOWBALL EFFECT"

I do not profess to have all of the answers, shoot, any answers for that matter. I am just writing it down as it comes to me. I know that in the midst of this journey, somehow I have adjusted my compass slightly to the right or to the left, and I may be a little of course. I am going to adjust my compass, and slowly, start my way back towards the direction I was going in when I started this blog. I know I'm just going to have to say NO to some stuff, and some people. I guess this is me facing one of my biggest FEARS...people bondage. Wanting to please people. THANK YOU LORD for showing me that.

I am going to go back and read DAY 1. See what I failed to do....this blog is supposed to be about me getting closer to GOD. Am I REALLY doing that? Are WE really doing that?

DAY 15 - What am I so affraid of?

Hmmmm. I asked myself this question when I got an email earlier today. It's not easy to look at and judge yourself. However, when posed with the question -What are you affraid of? - I had to examine my deepest, most insecure emotions. Now that I have looked on the inside, and pulled out some stuff I really didn't want to admit or deal with, what do I do next? I must go to the WORD of GOD, the bible, and find out what HE has to say about FEAR, or being affraid.
The same person that sent me the email actually followed up with a phone call. They had me read Matthew 6:25-34, out loud to them over the phone (sound familiar to any of you...casue I know i've done that in the past, asked you to read scripture out loud, lol).
The I read Phillipians 1:28. I had to read them a coupe of times to really get it, and take hold of them. But it was like a light bulb went off in my head when I did get it. If we are confident that GOD will supply ALL of our needs, and we walk and talk in that confidence and belive it to be true, we will be sustained. He will make sure we are covered. HE has our back! Don't even sweat the small stuff.....don't pout it on your plate. Pray, give it to HIM and let HIM work it out for you. Sounds simple...but the hard part is putting it into practice.
I challenge you guys today, look deep inside your heart, and find out what you need to give to GOD. The REAL STUFF....the real YOU. Ask HIM to take care of it, fix it, and give you peace! WATCH WHAT HAPPENS!

I feel compelled to share with you one of my biggest fears, only because we keep it 100!
This is just me searching my heart and being real.....after reding this, I would encourage you to do the same:
One of my biggest fears is the fear of being alone. Meaning, growing old by myself. This fear has motivated me, propelled me, and seduced me into using women when I was younger. making sure I had a different one to sleep with everynight. Even if I didn't really like them...just to have companionship. That's not my issue now, but I am just typing as it comes. You may know of someone who is like that. HELP THEM.
I can attest, fear will keep you paralyzed! Fear will also keep you connected to the thing you FEAR the most! SO LET IT GO!

**I am not suggesting that you post your fears. I know it can be uncofmortable, but if you do see anything posted, please pray for that person who posted. Agree with them that their fears and concerns are already taken care of, and that they have peace and security in GOD's word.

TODAY'S MEDITATION
Just because a circumstance speaks to you...you don't have to listen!

SONG OF THE DAY
The song of the day was delayed today, because I couldn't find the right song to go with today's post. Then, Thalia commented, and the light bulb went off yet again. I started to hear the chorus of this song in my head immediately. It took me a minute, but I found it. I apologize if the sound quality isn't as good as the other post...but its the message that counts. " Let Go & Let God" by Men of Praise....ENJOY FAMILY!!!
Thank You Thalia!

DAY 14 - Keeping it 100!

Good morning everyone....I know it seems like I posted two day's back to back...well, I did! LOL
I figured it would get back to REAL TIME BLOGGING.

With that being said, I think I made a mistake, and I am going to need your prayers this morning. I accepted a video gig without really knowing the times of the shoot for this morning. I just figured, I could use the money. But when I found out that the times conflicted with my church attendance, it was yesterday. Too late to cancel. So this morning, I got up and I am feeling funny. I am hoping that this is not a DISTRACTION! (wow..that just reminded me of a poem I wrote)
I had to cancel on my man Russ coming with me to church. I wasn't even thinking about that when I accepted the job. SORRY RUSS! I dropped the ball. I feel like a fool right now. ANYWAY...being a man of my word....shoot, I can't even say that now because it conflicts with what I stated previously about going to church, DAG. Well, being that I put my self into a position which may or may not be a detrement to my goals, I have reasoned that I will ddo the shoot, then go to my church as soon as possible, to get as much as I can. Then make sure I purchase the DVD of today's service, and watch it TO-DAY! I will begin my prayers for everyone when I get in the car. Just so you know, I was doing it as a favor for a dear friend of mine, and if they read it, please don't feel guilty. I just wanted to help...just didn't add up the cost. Its my mistake. Oh, one more thing....Keeping it 100 means = 100% real.
I am really looking forward to learning my lesson for today! Lova Ya'll!


Here is that poem I was talking about......this is where I was last spring:

DISTRACTED

I am under attack!
I am wounded and weak,
But I WON”T GO BACK.
I cannot retreat.
I know that I’m supposed to pray right now,
But I can’t seem to speak!

My stomachs knotted up
And it gets hard to swallow.
Feels like every step I take,
There’s a “Black Cloud” that follows

I got pretty women to my right,
A mountain of bills straight ahead,
My boss is in my left ear
And I ain’t here a thing that she said!

I borrowed so much money
I’m too ashamed to add it up-
I feel like I’m stuck…
This burden’s heavy as a truck
PLUS-
You’re boy is outta shape.
I joined a gym, got a free personal trainer,
And can’t seem to get that straight.

My Inconsistency’s are hurting me,
I can’t seem to finish what I begin.
I distract myself with more & more stuff,
before I put the old stuff to and end.

My ignorance is embarrassing.
It’s not like I don’t know where to go to get the answer.
And just when I am feeling sorry for MYSELF,
I just found out a friend of mine has breast cancer!

I wanna use the power of prayer, lay hands, and save her life…
But, I need savin too,
Cause I ain’t been spending enough time with Christ.

Corey B
copywrite 2008

DAY 13 - Azia's Birthday -WOW!

WHAT UP PEOPLE! I made it by midnight! LOL
I just got back from Azia's birthday gathering at Dave & Busters. It was great. I showed Az all of the birthday greetings from everyone, and she said that she is going to write to everyone on the blog real soon. It was just a busy day in general. I had a shoot in the morning, then shopping in the afternoon, then the party. Fun was had by all. Thank you for all of your support throught these past two weeks. People are still coming to visit the blog, joining the followers list, inquiring about my journey. Its still reaching people. ITS WORKING YA'LL!

TODAY'S MEDITATION
I have been meditating on you guys again. I'd like to know how you guys feel about being apart of this journey? Have you learned anything so far? Have you applied anything to your life? Have you seen change? Do you have any suggestions for the improvement of the blog? Let me know how it has helped you.


I pray that all is well with you and your family's! That you are happy and healthy in your body and your finances. I pray you continue to pray for me, and I will continue to pray for you. Be safe, and enjoy your life...its the only one we get! I love my blog family!


SONG OF THE DAY
Mary Mary has done it again! This song is so hot! The beat will suck you in, but the lyrics are the real substance to this song. "I Worship You" -is a THANK YOU song dedicated to GOD. We must be thankful for where we are ya'll.....Show your appreciation for everything you have, and thank HIM for everything that you're about to get! Believe me, it works!

(For the record: I feel old! Az just turned 17)

DAY 12 It's Working

Today was a blur!
I worked over night last night, so I slept most of the day away today. I can tell you that, when I was driving in my car I automatically broke into prayer. I am subconciously getting at least 15 minutes of prayer in each day...on my way to 30 minutes! Today I found myself just having a regular old conversation with GOD. Just talking to HIM like it was a conversation between you and me. I can tell I am getting stronger. The stuff I used to do, I no longer have the taste for. it was like I said before...its like I am Neo in the Matrix. I can see things before they happen.

TODAY'S MEDITATION
I'd be lying if I said I had a new meditation today. I am not ashamed to admit, I am still stuck on: Temptation is an offer.....and offers can be refused!
I am still there . I think that is such a profound, yet simple, practical statement. So when posed with a decision or a question, that comes into my rememberance. AVOID TEMPTATION,,,,you see it coming. MOVE OUT OF THE WAY!!!!!!
I remember I used to talk myself into a bad situation, then feel like I had to follow through, cause I talked so much junk! Now, I catch myself...I see the words before they come out of my mouth. Then I do the math in my head, If I say THIS...then they will say THAT! LOL. I have seen this movie already! I just keep my mouth shut or say positive, neutral things. I was affraid that if I didn't say what I was thinking, I was going to miss out on something. Well, I was wrong. It doens't hurt. I am getting used to the MINISTRY OF SILENCE! :O)

Hope you guys liked the SONG OF THE DAY!

Tomorrow is a BUSY day! Will keep you posted!

DAY 11- A little off track

Well, as you know, I keep it 100 on this blog. I share the good and the not so good. One of the reasons I put myself out there is so that I am held accountable to my friends and family. I had to take a few minutes and reflect on the reason for starting this blog, and that was TO GET CLOSER TO GOD. I cannot get closer to GOD if I am not reading HIS word. I haven't been. I haven't been consistent. I am putting it out there because, this is usuall the point where I say, FORGET IT. HA!!!! BUT I AM NOT GOING TO SAY THAT. I am going to recommit. I am going to pick up right where I left off,a nd catch up to my current day in my bible reading plan. I guess from this moment forward, I'll be posting the scriptures that I've read for the day...adn not PLAN to read! I have been going to church. I have been praying more often. I've gotten smarter, and I have heard from GOD directly. But its not over. There is more to get.....more to see....experience.....hear. I am at the tip of the icebeg, and he is showing me in incriments, just how good HE can be. This is something that we ALL go thru. I'm not down at all..so please don't get that impression. I am so excited, its ridiculous. Cause I spotted a weakness, and I am correcrting it. HAHAHAHAHAHA to the devil. Cause you're not gonna get me with this test. I am going to pass this one homie. I wish I would have done this blog earlier! Shoot.
I say that because, I was great at appearing that everything was fine with me. That I had no real issues, no worries, I am just moving along thru life without problems. A lot of you know me for always having a smile on my face or making you laugh by saying something funny, the party starter. But when I learned that I had to judge myself, I realized that I needed some work. this blog is the best workout i've ever experienced. You guys who read the blog are great too!!!!
You guys are right here with me......I know, cause you tell me in the comments and emails. I wouldn't, couldn't do this without you guys-FOR REAL. I have an obligation to GOD first, to myself, and to all of you. Even the people who hadn't been here yet........when they come, they are gonna see themselves in one of these postings.

TODAY'S MEDITATION
Temptation is just and offer...........You don't have to accept that offer!
Yep...I put it out there again, because I wanted to remind myself of that. I was tempted to quietly, slip into the cracks and stop reading my bible....or nto read it as much as I want to, and not mention it to you guys.....but I DO NOT ACCEPT THAT OFFER! Instead, I am going to go harder. Now, if I can just get past the temptation to eat donuts....I'll be alright!

SONG OF THE DAY
OK.....I was trying to hold off on putting this song on the blog. Trying to wait for the perfect time...for some super revelation or something, but I can't hold it any longer! I let Terry hear this song the other day. I told him that this is my favorite song in the whole wide world right now! :O) I played it, and when it was done he said," Uhhh, Corey. Can you play that song again please brother!" He's hooked....as you will be!
"Chasing After You" by Tye Tribbett(yet again). I have to give props where props are due, I was put on to this song by my dear friend Robin. She kept telling me, buy that Tye Tribbett album....did you get it, did you get it. Then one day after church, she told me to get in her car and made me listen to this song. THANK YOU ROBIN!!!!!!
Just so ya'll know...i'm leaving this song up for two days!!!!!

This is an email that I recieved from a college buddy of mine. It took her a minute to get to the blog...but she made it!

Wow Corey!!! I didnt know that you were such a passionate writer!! You need to keep this up!! I was in tears of joy and sadness while reading your "28" days. You have turned into a super good man. I am proud of you. I really didn't know the closeness you had with your daughter, but now I am perfectly clear. Keep up the kind words and the positive reinforcement. As a teacher I can tell you that children do much better when they have parents who truly care and want the best for their children. I love you even more after reading this than I have all the days that I have known You!!
Ni

Thanks you for your support ya'll!

Where are my praise reports?????

DAY 10 - THANKSGIVING

My daughter has a 77 average in school right now!!!!! That's a C+ in most school. We are getting closer! LOL

She was failing Math, Spanish, and Chemistry.....as of January. However, as of today, she has an 88 in math, an 80 in spanish, and a 65 in chemistry! (ugh)
But she isn't failing them any more.

Here is the deal:
My daughter has sickle-cell anemia. When she was younger, a baby, she had a silent stroke. We had no idea that she had one until years later when she had an MRI on her brain. She had a little damage to her frontal lobe, but nothing too major. School has been somewhat of a challenge, especially math, because the stroke affected her organization skills. So when she had a bunch of number she had to put in order or remember a formula, she would have trouble. So we put her in tutoring forever, but her grades rarely improved. Then last semester, she was in turoring 3 times a week for these same classes. I did a lil research and found out that she had an admirer! LOL

So needless to say, no more tutoring!

I met with her counselors and told them what I had been doing on my end, and the teachers explained what they had been doing to help her. We came to the conclusion that she is just going to have to work harder to get better grades. This was the origin of my prayer for her, that she is a B student, and I know how to motivate her to become one. I sat her down and explained to her that if she wants anything from me, that she is going to have to show significant improvement in her grades. Not for me, but for her. She is in the 11th grade..the most important school year of her life. I didn't punish her, or beat her up. I just simply said NO to a couple of things, checked up on her more often, and stayed in her ear. I had long talks with her while we drove to doctor's appointments, and to family's house. Just reinforcing that she has to do better. I had her write out what she thinks she can do better personally to improve her grades. If I caught her slipping, i'd put her in rememberance of those things that she wrote. I also had her make a confessions list that she is to recite every morning. One of those confessions is that she is a B student. I also had her memorize a scripture from The Parable of the Fig Tree - MARK 11:12-26

King James Version -MARK 11:24
Jesus said - Therefore I say unto you, What things so ever ye desire, when ye pray, believe that ye recieve them, and ye shall have them.

The Amplified Bible Version - MARK 11:24
Jesus said - For this reason I am telling you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe (trust and be confident) that it is granted to you, and you will [get it].

Then, to build her confidence up, i'd ask her over and over, "Are you a B student?"
"Are you sure??" Then I'd have her say out loud,"I am a B student!".

Now when I ask her is she a B student, she answers with confidence and without hesitation -"YEP!"

Az is turning 17 this saturday. She wanted to have a party at Dave & Busters. I told her that she can have whatever she wants if her grades improved-SIGNIFICANTLY!
I said she could have a fun filled 17th birthday or the shortest birthday celebration in history, "HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" She told me that she had been trying to get her grades up, been studying, and she is a B student. So when I got her grades from her teachers today via email, I was very happy to see she made such a great improvement. She hadn't gotten to the B yet, but I can see she is on her way! Her dedication, committment, and diligence needed to be rewarded. So I told her that she can have the party. (I also gave her a little speech about life and adulthood, but thats for another blog).
I am EXTREMELY PROUD OF YOU BABY!!!!!!!

I must acknowledge her mom and step mom at this time as well. It's been a group effort. By no means did I want to sound like I was superdad or anything! :O) Thank You ladies for a job well done!

TODAY'S MEDITATION
What have I/we been saying about ourselves? I have been consciously making sure I stay positive with the words coming out of my mouth. I think its imperative to my transformation/journey to remind myself of the good in me, and the greatness before me. If I do slip and say something negative about myself, a situation, or another person, I quickly repent and apologize, cause that's not the real me. I gotta to get this thing right ya'll!
We have what we say, if we believe it.

SONG OF THE DAY
This is one of my daughters favorite songs. It's by Canton Jones - "Kingdom Business".
She is definately handling her business!!!!!! Shoot, I gotta be more like her!

*I'm knocking my prayer list down ya'll!

DAY 9 - It's not too late!

SONG OF THE DAY
"You Can Change" by Tye Tribbett & G.A. You may have heard this one before. It's a powerful song that is speaking to anyone and everyone, RIGHT WHERE THEY ARE! What ever you are doing in your life, and you're not pleased with...it's not too late to change it. I would advise- closing your eyes and just let the song minister to you as it has to me.

Good evening all!
Normally, how I write my entries on the blog are I write the title, then let the words flow out of my heart, then find a song that reflects what I am feeling or talking about. Well tonight, I was lead to do something different. I was driving and I put my ipod on random. I had only put gospel songs on my ipod in January, so I could stay connected to God. I didn't want to get distracted. I knew then that I was trying to hear from HIM. Honestly, since this month began, I did miss my hip hop LOL. So I put a couple of CLEAN albums on their.....I'm not always in the mood for gospel. LOL. But tonight, I am going to take them off again. Going to re-focus and allow the music to take me to where I need to go.
As I was driving and reflecting on the day's events, mondays blog entry and comments, I began to feel stronger. I began to take comfort int he fact that this blog is truly not about me! I am not going to go into a long soliloquy or anything. All I am saying is, we are all changing and this is just a tool in that change. I hope the Song Of The Day speaks to your spirit....evokes change, or evokes you to encourage someone to change. You see what it's done for me!

BUILD-BREAK-BUILD
-I was able to allow someone to sow into my life without feeling prideful today.

- I realized that I could do better in the "working out" category. Gotta get back on it.

- Although I started to go to the movies at 10:15, I decided against it because I had not yet submitted my blog entry. I didn't want to go home yet, I wanted to be out and about. Then I heard, you can still do it....but you are still accountable to the people who read the blog. So I came home........and I am so glad I was able to be obedient!!!!

TODAY'S MEDITATION
I meditated on family today. Mostly my blog family. I really appreciate you guys. FOR REAL. You guys have blessed me more than you know. It's time for another praise report.......
(adding that to my prayer list)

DAY 8 - I REPENT

Hello again peoples!!!!!

I titled this I REPENT because today, I was extremely lazy. I didn't do anything really...didn't do my reading this morning. Didin't update the blog early enough. Didn't do any work. I was just a bum! I REPENT. I realized another character flaw in myself today, and thats the spirit of COMPLACENCY. Once I think " I got it", I get complacent. It's been going on for years. I always push it down whenever it reers its ugly head in my life. And the funny thing is, it always shows up AFTER the fact. AFTER I was lazy, after I neglected to do something.

So in Jesus' name, I bind the spirit of complacency! I pray that I never get tired or lazy in my pursuit of GOD! Lord, I pray that you allow the Holy Ghost to give me a nudge everytime complacency begins to settle in my spirit! I pray that the more you reveal to me, the more I'll hunger for your Word and your Direction. I repent to you Lord, and I repent to the viewers of this blog. I declare that I complete the rest of my 28 day journey with ferver and an unquenchable thirst! I pray right now for quick results in the loves of the viewers of this blog. That ALL of their needs are met. That they have no debt. Their body's are healed. And that they are delivered from from any spirits that are in contradiction to your Word. I thank you that my prayers are heard and answered. It's in your Son's name I pray. AMEN!!!!!

TODAY'S MEDTATION
Today I can honestly say that I was meditation on the wrong thing! I was meditating on the thought, that I was reaching enough people with my blog. That my closest friends weren't with me on my journey. I found myself, pleading with people to PLEASE read the blog. Trying to tell them how important it is to me that they at least read it. I was certaint that once they read it, they would get stuck...and join or read it daily. I thought for sure I wouldn't have anything to write on the blog for today...no miracles, or great revelations....I was putting so much pressure on myself. But, I can honestly say that things have been working without me even knowing.
Upon writing this entry, I was reminded of how people have been telling me all day, that they have been to the blog. That they read it, was inspired or motivated by it. But I was looking for something so profound that I almost missed it. I almost didn't appreciate their visit. I did thank them for visiting, but I was waiting for this big explosion or earthquake...I ALMOST MISSED IT!
Thank GOD I didn't miss it though. Thank you to Dominique, Robin, Patricia, & Tara for letting me know that you visited. Thank you for the encouraging words of support. Thank you for letting me know that I touched you or motivated you and that you are behind what I am doing 100%. I really needed support today, and I almost overlooked all of the support that I had right in my face. THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart. THANK YOU GOD!!!

TODAY"S BUILD-BREAK-BUILD
(Say something good about yourself-then something you could have done better in-then finish with something good about yourself)
I made sure that I posted something to the blog -I was selfish today, and lazy-I acknowledged a problem, and fixed it immediately!

SONG OF THE DAY
"Your Mercy" by BLESSED is the song of the day because its message is so profound. Usually, the spirit leads me to the S.O.T.D. but, last night, I couldn't find one that I felt was right. Well, lo and behold, when I opened my email, I had this song sent to me. Talk about in the spirit!!!!!
Thank You KBrenai!!!!!
Perfect timing!

DAY 7 - WE WIN!

Good day/evening all. I know I am later than usual. Hope I hadn't disappointed. :O)
I want to say that God directed every step of mine today....give you guys some elaborate story about how I saw more FAITH signs and stuff, but it wasn't like that today. Today, it was church, but not church as usual.
Upon creating the blog, I sent it to a new friend of mine, who I actually met on-line. He is from my neighborhood in the Bronx, and he created a website for all of us to reconnect. After he read the blog, he decided to become a follower of the blog and he also left a comment. He said that he is with me on my journey, and he was going to go me with me to church the next few weeks and take the journey with me! TALK ABOUT SUPPORT!!! I met this man once, spoke to him on the phone three times, and he is all aboard my journey! WOW.
So he and I met this morning, exactly at the time we said we were going to meet. We went to church. We had a great time! Then we went to lunch. It was a beautiful day spent with my brother.
I just wanted to let Russell know that I admire him, appreciate his friendship, and consider him a true friend. As most of you know, once you are my friend, we are friends for life! Russell, we are friends for life!
I also spoke to the media volunteer ministry leader and told them that I was interested in voluneteering in the media dept. I realized that I was not spiritually employed, and my heart is deeply rooted in my church. So I am eagerly anticipating their response tomorrow. YEP, TOMORROW.
I am also anticipating what's going to happen this week. I have a feeling that starting tomrrow, we are all going to be getting good news. Confirmations. Answers. It has to happen.
Thank you to all of you who support the blog too. You're breakthrough is right around the corner. DO NOT GIVE UP on your walk! remember, in the end WE WIN!

TODAY'S MEDITATION
Today, for some reason, the word LOVE has been in my head all day. I was trying to figure out, when is LOVE at its strongest point within me. When do I show LOVE, need LOVE.....I realized yesterday that, there is No LOVE like the LOVE of GOD. When he directed my path, you couldn't tell me NOTHING! I am kinda still in the afterglow of that experience. I also felt it everytime I spoke to someone about it. I actually took the time to give a testimony at church about yesterday. I have decided that before this week is up, I am going to tell everyone that I LOVE how I feel about them. Wether it be by phone, email, text...they will here it from me.

SONG OF THE DAY
While sitting in my car this morning, I came across this song in my ipod. When I glanced over it, I was like, "Nahhhhhh!" Then, I went back, played it, and actually listened to the lyrics. This is a powerful song ya'll! The song nearly moved me to tears......please listen to it with an open heart. We've all heard it before, but try to listen to it diferently today! The Commodores (w/Lionel Richie) - " JESUS IS LOVE"

I LOVE YOU!!!!!!

DAY 6 - FAITH (pt.1)

It's SATURDAY YA'LL!!!!! Almost one whole week for the blog. I am still extremely excited about what is going on....right now, at this very moment!!!
Sorry for the late entry.....read along, and you'll see what my delay was:

So I take my daughter to the hair dresser this morning, drop her off, and proceed to drive towards my home. On my way home, I am listening to some gospel to figure out what the song of the day for today was going to be. As I get deeper into the music, God begins to speak to me. LITERALLY. He is telling me to make a right here.....so I make the right. Now I amon Bankhead highway, the old Bankhead Highway...its called Veterans Memorial pkwy now, but anyway, if you know Atlanta, you know that this is the hood. So as I am driving, I see an old, abandoned Wendy's restaurant. I was like WOW...the recession! So, I was inspired to take pics of abandoned buildings and things that reflect the recession. However, God told me to wait on that, he wanted me to focus on taking different pictures. He told me that the recesiion project was for myself, my friends James, Oscar, and Gus to do collectively, since we are started doing photography at the same time. (The recession portfolio is coming soon-stay tuned)
So, anyway, God told me about a week ago to take pictures of the word FAITH everytime I saw it. I did take one picture last week, but then I kinda forgot about it. Well, HE reminded me of what he told me to do last week, take picture of the word FAITH. So, as I am driving towads Atlanta on Bankhead Highway, I see a huge billboard withthe word FAITH on it. LOL. So I pull into this small church's parking lot across the street from the sign. I get out of the car, pull out the camera and start taking pics.
As I am taking these pics, a man come out of the church and says to me, " Hey! You should be taking pictures of me!" At first I couldn't hear him. SO I kept shooting. Then he said it again, " You should be taking pictures of me." So I turned and asked him what did he say. He told me what he said, then I replied, " OK...come on and take some pictures then!" Hahahaha. So now he gets all shy, and is like, "I'm just joking..playing around." UH HUH..he talked all that smack. :O)
So I ended up taking his picture. Then we started talking. I told him that God told me to take pictures of the word FAITH everytime I saw it. Then I pointed to the sing across the street. He was surprised, and happy that I was being obedient. He told me if I ever wanted to come in and check out a service, I was more than welcomed. Now, at that moment, I heard HIS voice again. He told me to print out the best picture that I took of that man, and bring it back to him. I didn't tell him that, but of course I am going to do it. So he and I wrapped up our conversation, and I was back on my way down Bankhead highway.
*side note: I don't remember his name....I do know he was a Deacon. I just learned a valuable lesson as I was typing.....make sure I write and remember these people I meet. There is a reason for our paths crossing. LESSON LEARNED...and I THANK YOU LORD!!!!!
I am back on the road, and I come across a church with the word FAITH in it's title. I start laughing, cause this is almost too good to be true. I pulled over into their parking lot, and then I saw the church van with the name of the church on it. I get out and start taking a few pics of the van. Then all of a sudden a man walks out, and asks what I was doing. I told this gentleman, I was told by God to take pictures of the word FAITH everytime I saw it. I was driving by, I saw the name of the church, and then I saw the van, which I thought would be an interesting picture. He was also excited. He told me that it was extremely important that I obeyed what I had heard. Not many people obey!
He also told me it was his church, and that he was looking to expand. He showed me his back lot and said that he wanted to buy it andbuild another building for his ministry. (I am adding him to my prayer list). I asked him if he wanted to be in the pictures with the van and the church sign. He looked himself up and down, tugged onthe bottom of his jacket, zipped up his zipper halfway, and said," Sure!" I took a few pics of him too.

Then I was back on Bankhead driving towards Atlanta. Not more than 5 minutes up the road, I see another church with FAITH in the title. Haaaaaaaa!!!!! I'm like YES! Its almost like a game now.....make sure I don't miss the word FAITH. So I hop out and take the pic of the church.

I only got a couple, and then I was back on the road. I couldn't wait to see the next FAITH sign. A few minutes later, I get a call from KBrenai. She tells me she just saw the last comment Terry made from last night. I told her that I hadn't been ont he blog yet, but I am smack dab in the middle of TODAY'S ENTRY! I am on a journey, that is being directed by God. I told her about the previous pictures I had taken, and then I said," I hope I get to see the word FAITH on more than just signs for chuchs." At that exact moment, I passed a Church's Chicken restaurant! I was like, you won't believe what I am looking at right now!!! We both were like WHOA!! Then, a few feet past the churchs chicken sign, I saw another sign CHURCH ZONE! I had to stop and take a picture of that. So we are both in amazement at this point.

(I know you weren't looking for them, but check out the bullet holes in the sign-WTHeck!)

Now I am in downtown Atlanta, and I see my boys store PHAT GEAR. They sell hip hop cloths, cd's, dvd's, and sneakers. I am like, let me go over there and say whats up to my boy Hassan. So I pull over, park, and get out of the car. KBrenai is still on the phone with me. I saw my camera, and I said,"Hold up! let me grab my camera. God just told me that the word FAITH is going to be somewhere in this store! I need you to stay on this phoone with me until I see the word FAITH, so you can experience this in real time with me." K said, "WOW". So I grabbed the camera, and walked into the store.

I said, "WHAT UP" to Hassan. Then I said, "Do you have the word FAITH on anything in this store? ANYTHING. Shirt, CD, DVD...anything? " He said that he didn't think so. So I said, " I am telling you...I know that you do! Would you mind doing a little search, just look around and see if you see it?" So he obliged, and turned around and started to look for the word faith. I saw a sign that had a bunch of words on it.......I stared intently at the sign. No FAITH. Then I looked at another sign right next to it, no faith. Then I looked at Hassan, and he was giving me the "you're out of luck buddy" look! Then I turned to my left, and BAM! There was a t-shirt with the word FAITH in it staring me right in the face! I start screaming, " I TOLD YOU!!!! I TOLD YOU THAT FAITH WAS IN THIS STORE!!!!" Now mind you, KBrenai is still on the phone with me. LOL. Some I am like,"WHOA! GOD IS SO GOOD! I TOLD YOU!" Feeling it!!!!

So then K got off the phone. Hassan and I got into this conversation about faith and I told him what I was doing. I stayed in the store for a little while when my daughter texted me to come pick her up. So I leave and head towards her direction. Now, I am $5 short on her hair money. I stop at my bank to get some money, but I know I had little funds in there. I check my balance, and its $3.94 in my account. Then I call my other account and they tell me they closed my personal account, but left my busines account open. I'm like WOW.....So in a matter of minutes, I am deflated. Just then K calls me back. I had texted her a picture of the t-shirt from earlier and she called to tell me about it. She heard that something was wrong in my voice, and asked what was up. I told her. Then she said, "Well, thats why you've been on this journey all day. It's to build your FAITH." Ha!!!! the lightbulb goes off in my head. I'm like, you are right. I know what I'll do. We both said a quick little prayer about finances, then I was on my grind to get $5. So I went and used an emergency account that I wasn't supposed to touch. Went to the supermarket, brought my daughter her favrite drink, Sprite, and then got $5 cash back. I got pick up my daughter, and she's like, "Ooo a sprite! I am so thirsty! Thank You Daddy!" LOL
On the drive home, I am explaining to her what has been going on with me since I had left her this morning. I told her that I was smack dab, in the middle of something big. I asked her to see if she saw any signs or anything with the word FAITH in it. As we are driving, I did see an interesting sign, Favor Road. So I made a U turn and asked her to take the picture for me, so I didn't have to get out of the car. She did......and we kept it moving.

(photography by Azia)

Then I asked her if I was taking her to her mothers house or my house, then made a right like if I were going to my house. Then I realized that she didn't have a change of clothes at my house, so I had to turn around at the light. As I made my right turn to find a place to turn around, there were 3 different churches on each corner. The two in my immediate view didn't have the word FAITH in their names on anywhere on their signage, but when I turned to my left to make sure the road was clear for me to make this right turn, I saw the third church had FAITH in their title! I laughed out loud (scared my daughter),a nd said, "See! This is why I made that wrong turn and had to turn around! So I could see that sign with FAITH in it." My daughter was like,"You're scaring me." Hahahahahahahahahahaha.
I told her to relax, and enjoy the experience. I pulled over and took the picture.

Now, I turn around, and head back towards her moms house. While we were driving, I told her that I am confident that we are going to see at least one more sign with the word FAITH in it. She looked at me, and smiled. In the mean time, I called my boy Gus to let him know about the Recession pictures I wanted to take. While we were talking, I explained to him how I got the inspiration, and that God told me to share it with the fellas. I told him I didn't want to go into details about what journey I was on today, but just read the blog later to get the full gist of it. After a few minutes, I couldn't hold it any longer, and I told him about all of the faith pics I took, and my experiences. He was buggin...I could tell there was a little apprehension in his voice though. At that moment, my daughter points emphatically straight ahead. I ask her what was it, and she said it was a FAITH sign! YEP. While I am on the phone with Gus, in real time, we come to another FAITH sign! Now Gus is laughing and like WOW....I am like,"I am telling you...I am in the middle of this thing right now! Are you hearing this. There is a FAITH sign right in front of me. I'm pulling over...I am taking out the camera....I am taking the pic!" Gus is like, "WOW". Hahahahahahaha
So I am excited, Gus is excited, my daughter is excited.....we all all caught up in the right now. Gus and I got off of the phone, and I am close to home now. My neck is stretched out now for real, expecting to see another FAITH sign. I drove around my whole neighborhood looking for one more sign...LOL. I didn't see anything. So I pull up to the house, she gets out and check the mail. I am getting my things out of the car. I asked her was there anything for me in the mail? She holds up one envelope. I could tell from distance it was a check! PRAISE GOD!!!! I had $3 in my account, now I got this check. Hahahahahahaha. GOD IS SO GOOD. Words can't even describe what I am feeling today!!!!!!!


SONG OF THE DAY
My favorite song by my favorite voice -Faith Evans, "KEEP THE FAITH".
All I can say is, listen to the words......just listen to the words!

DAY 5 - COINCIDENCE????

Welcome back to the blog everyone. I decided to call today's entry COINCEDENCE because, I know its not just a coincidence that this is happening right now.
I was telling a friend on the phone about how things have been lining up since Saturday, January 31, 2009. That day I was having trouble cashing a check and had to drive way outside my area to get it done. I then bumped into a friend of mine who I used to work with. He and I got to talking, and I told him about a book that I was writing. Then he told me how he is producing audio books! Once he went into detail about what he does and how he does it, I needed no convincing, I needed to do an audio book too! He and I exchanged information, and needless to say, I was very excited.
So, later that night I go on line, and have a conversation with a new friend I met on facebook. We start talking and they tell me that they sing and do voice overs for a living!!!!! I'm like...wow! We worked out a deal to where I would shoot them while they sang the National Anthem at a basketball game, and they would do a voice over for my book!
COINCEDENCE?????

I wrote on day one how I had a hard time finishing things, projects that I start. Then, in the comments section, I get the answer - S.M.A.C. Then, I am on the phone with a friend of mine today who stated that he had the same issue, not finishing. I referred him to S.M.A.C. also!
While we were talking, he mentioned that he knew an executive at Tyler Perry Studio....and he was going to give him a call so we could all go out to dinner. Intorduce me, so I could possibly get a job!
COINCIDENCE?????

I was sitting next to my boy Terry when that preacher made the prophecy over that couples pregnancy challenges. I was sitting next to Terry when we BOTH saw that prophecy's manifestation in church on sunday!
COINCIDENCE?????

I said yesterday that I wanted to add two people to my prayer list, and tonight alone, I had my cousin call me with some issues, and a co-worker that confided in me. I told them BOTH I would pray for them.
COINCIDENCE?

Then, earlier yesterday, I get this line in my head in regards to the blog:
THEIR breakthrough is Your breakthrough.
I had no idea what it meant at the time. I was just going to throw it up on the blog yesterday during my updates because I thought it was so profound. I just couldn't figure out how, where to put it...thats when, "We got your back...but YOU get your front" popped into my head, so I went with that instead.
Then I take a nap. When I awoke, I heard a voice telling me that the key to my answered prayer was to pray for others! I had been taught that before, but this was different. I automatically felt a hunger to pray for others. It was like I finally GOT IT! The light bulb went off. I am not supposed to be repeating my same old prayer everyday, hoping GOD answeres them, I am supposed to let you guys handle that part, and in turn, I am going to be praying for YOU!
My confirmation to that was when I read the comments from DAY 4. It really started on DAY 1, but on DAY 4 you can see some things happeneing. Complete strangers are concerned about one another! They are praying for one another, listening to one another, heeding each others advice, making sure they stay on task, genuinely concerned for one another well being. The focus wasn't on COREY...it was the BLOG. The focus was people getting answers and talking to people who care.
It brought me to tears and I had immediately broke into prayer when I read Thalia's comments to KBrenai yesterday. Then Terry telling Tamia that he is praying for her friends baby!
I have no idea where this is going, but I am going to let GOD lead!!!!!
I am so caught up in the RIGHT NOW, I don't know how it can get better than this!!!!!

TODAYS MEDITATION
THEIR breakthrough is Your breakthrough.

SONG OF THE DAY
"God in Me" by MARY MARY. As usual, MARY MARY comes thru with powerful, in your face lyrics over a contemporary, bouncy feel. You'll be nodding your head, raising your arms, and pumping your fist to the chorus by days end! It's time to let the GOD in each of us shine through.....When they ask, why are we so happy, or why are we so favored, we'll just tell them - "It's the GOD in me!....It's the GOD in meee!"

DAY 4-Updated

Hello all....I am going to have to update todays blog a little later in the morning. I've been working with some photo's tonight...had a deadline. In regards to Terry Hills comments in yesterdays post:
I was giving Terry a ride home from bible study last night. I asked him if he had been to the blog since monday,a nd he said no. he didn't know I was updating it so often. So I opened the blog on my phone and he began to read what he had missed out loud. As he read, I got off at his exit. We came to a light where we saw a homeless man asking for money. We were about four cars down from the corner, but we could see him. Terry got to the part where I wanted to give cloths to the homeless....which I failed to do the day before. Before Terry even got out the whole sentence, I had already popped the trunk, and gathered some Timbs, and a few sweaters to give to the homeless man. The light turned green, and I pulled up, gave him the clothes and boots. The homeless man was extremely grateful. Told us thank you, and said God bless us, and he loved us! :O)
I then told the man, NO PROBLEM, and pulled off...took Terry to his crib. Terry said good night and thanks, then got out of the car, and was headed towards his door. I rolled down my window and told Terry, " That felt great! Giving that man thos clothes felt really good!" Terry replied, " That Blessed Me!!!!". I was glad to share that experience with my brother.....I am glad to share that experience with you!

I will get back with you guys a little later. be blessed...and please, share some good news in my comments section. I know most of you have experienced somthing positive in the past three days...I KNOW IT.

------------------------------UPDATES--------------------------------

YESTERDAYS SUMMARY
-I did take my daughter to the doctor
-I made it to a GREAT BIBLE STUDY!!!!!
-I did say prayer for everyone viewing the blog
-Ok......the script thing...LOL. I didn't get a chance to write, a photo project came up, and then I got distracted. I am not even going to lie...I could have finished it, if I had managed my time better. MY BAD!!!!!
-I did talk to someone about helping me complete the vision though, and he is on board 100%. So I am excited. Just gotta get the script tight and revised. It will be done this week!

DISTRACTIONS
-Yesterdays distraction was my poor time managament-procrastination in other words. Just another little quirk that needs adjusting!

BUILD-BREAK-BUILD for the DAY3
I gave a homeless man some clothes and boots in 20 degree weather! That was probably the best thing i've done all week...besides start the blog - of course, my DVD script didn't get done due to my procrastination and poor time management -I have been consistent in reading my bible daily, and praying daily! (used to be a huge challenge)

TODAY'S GOALS (this is the SMAC version, because I hate falling short - THANK YOU AGAIN NEPHEW)
-FINISH MY SCRIPT!!!!!!!(come on Corey)
-Add to my prayer list-I will add two people to my prayer list today!
-Pray for fifteen minutes-out loud
-Read my daily scriptures
**if you guys are wondering what scripture I read, I am on the Bible Reading plan that my church provides on line. It takes you throught the entire bible in one years time. It directs you to read scriptures in the morning, and scriptures at night.
Here is the link: http://creflodollarministries.org/Public/Bible/Bible-Reading-Plan.aspx
Click on the dates next to February...I am on day 36. Toomorrow will be day 37, and so on and so on. You are more than welcomed to join me..and even discuss what you've read......

TODAY'S MEDITATION
Today is different. Today's meditation is for YOU. I am going to be focussing on how we can help, pray, & support those of you who need help, prayer, & support. However, we can pray for you all day long, but if you don't pray for yourself, and believe that you will recieve whatsoever you pray for, we are wasting out time. So, my meditation is the SONG OF THE DAY! The song of the day speaks for itself....
WE got your back...but make sure YOU got your front!

DAY 3

Transparency
1.
The quality or state of being transparent.

2.
something transparent, esp. a picture, design, or the like on glass or some translucent substance, made visible by light shining through from behind.

That is what this whole journey is about. Being able to show myself and others how each decision impacts the other. How we can't be affraid to make mistakes, but more importantly, we can't be affraid to admit those mistakes. Lord knows I've made many, many, many mistakes! LOL But he also knows I've done many things to help others and make up for some of those mistakes in other ways.

I had a really good prayer last night! A really honest prayer. I will expound on it later...I do want you to know that I prayed for each of you this morning....everyone who asked for prayer about a specific reason got prayed for twice!


SONG OF THE DAY
Todays song of the day is "I NEED YOU" by Tye Tribbett and G.A.
It has a pop feel to it, however it is extremely soulful! I guarantee, if you just listen to the whole song, you'll be singing I NEED YOU along with the chorus at the end. Tye did his thing with this one!

YESTERDAYS SUMMARY
I got the prayer list up and going! Read my scriputres, prayed out loud for at least 15 minutes, wrote my script out, but only half way. I only copied what I already had on paper. I was too tired to be creative. I think I procrastinated too much. I did get my car fixed though.

DISTRACTIONS
My biggest distraction was the tv. I gotta learn not to put it on as soon as I sit down...bad habit.
Another distraction or set back was that I got up too late. I woke up around 12ish...way too late for me to accomplish my goals for the day. Oh, and I got my car fixed.

TODAYS GOALS
-Take daughter to the doctor
-make bible study
-pray for everyone viewing the blog
-finish the script for my DVD (i'm mad that I am writing this again)

TODAYS MEDITATION
What i'll be meditating/ thinking about today is the BUILD-BREAK-BUILD technique:
Compliment yourself on something good you've done today, then criticize something you need to improve on, and then end with another good compliment.

DAY2 - I did my prayer list-I didn't make it to the gym-I did call a few people and offered prayer! (wow, that felt kinda good!!!!!!)

Day 2

YESTERDAY'S SUMMARY
Ok, so I made it through the first day. I accomplished some of what I chose to accomplish yesterday. I didn't play basketball though. My daughter and I did watch First Blood together, but she had a headache and fell asleep on me. So I stayed in and took care of her during the evening. I think I need to ammend my goals by making sure I do them by 12am midnight, or else it would be considered the next day. I am about to pop in a dvd of service. So, i'll be accomplishing my goals by 12 midnight from now on. I did read my scriptures though, and they stayed with me all day! I have read all of the comments, and I gotta say THANK YOU!!!!
Yesterday I learned that there are a lot of us that needed an avenue for open dialog about God. I also learned that you guys give great advice! :O) I learned alot from you guys.

TODAYS GOALS
Today, I plan on going to the gym to work out for real.
I am going to finish the script for my DVD.
I am going to compose my prayer list.
I am going to give some clothes and boots to the homeless.
I am going to call someone and ask them if they need prayer for anything.
I am going to read my scriptures in the morning and in the evening.
I am going to pray for 15 minutes-out loud.

TODAY'S MEDITATION
Today I will meditate, think about, how to apply SMAC - Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Challenging - to my life, and this journey. My nephew broke it down in yesterday's comments section. Please check it out. I hope it helps!

SONG OF THE DAY
My song for today is "Falling In Love With Jesus" by Jonathan Butler. I wish I could add it to the blog, but I hadn't figured that part out yet. Its a smooth, guitar lead, melodic song, that is straight to the point. Its soothing, easy to remember, and will attatch itself to your memory rather quickly.
Whenever I hear it, it always calms me down.

*Note: I was inspired to add a song of the day to the blog because of my friends email tag-line. She is a gifted song writer and vocalist, and her tag-line motivated me -
"Living One Song At A Time" .

DAY 1.....A new beginning

What up people!!! I know you are probably like, "Oh no...not another blog!!" LOL. YEP...its another blog. This blog is perhaps the most important blog that i've done or will ever do. This is about ME...the real ME, trying to get my life together. And YOU, yes YOU, helping me through my journey.
First off, let me say that I am not on drugs! LOL.
Ok, with that being said, I am about to go in, and just share my heart and a few other things:
I've always been on the fence with my Christianity. Some days I do good, others I forget that I am a Christian and do selfish things. I've always "Justified" or "Balanced Out" my short comings by saying that," I am only human." " Rome wasn't built in a day." " God knows my heart." hahahahahaha. Always saying to God and to myself, "I'll get it right tomorrow or the next time."
Well, after years of getting it wrong, and thousands of tomorrows, I'm still back to HERE! Wanting to do better.
I have realized alot about myself this past year (2008), and I am consciously going to make a better effort to change this year, well actually, within the next 28 days.
They say that a habit is formed in 21 days, so I figured that I would give myself a little wiggle-room! Just in case it doesn't take in the first 21 days.

OK..so I know you probably have a couple of questions, so I will try my best to answer them for you:
WHY -Quick story. I was in church today, and I saw a man and his wife walking up for prayer. I remembered that a few months ago, they went up for prayer because the doctors told them that the wife couldn't get pregnant, and the couple really wanted a child. The preacher spoke to the wifes stomach directly and told her that the stomach will work properly, that their prayers will be answered, and that God honors obedience. The preacher told the couple that God said that she'll be pregnant by October (2008).
So when I saw them this morning at church, I immediately looked at her stomach. YEP! She was pregnant. At least 5-6 months!!!! I was stuck! I sat there and said to myself, " This thing HAS to work! I am just doing it wrong." That is when God spoke directly to me, and gave me this idea.
He gave me specific instructions, and I am going to carry them out, no matter what anyone thinks! He told me to write down my Challenges, Goals, and my Daily acivity...to see if I am reaching my goals, and if not, why am I not reaching them. (side note: I have a lot of irons in the fire. I always seem to start a great idea, but don't finish. It's time to FINISH).

I also feel like, as I have grown into a man, its theraputic for ME to express myself. The good, the bad and the ugly.

Finally, I need SUPPORT. I know you guys care for me, and want me to succeed. So I'm going to need ALL of your support. I am hoping that at the end of my journey, I can take some people with me. Motivate some people to examine there own lives, and FINISH what ever they choose to start. Shoot, maybe even help someone. Please leave a COMMENT in the COMMENT section of this blog so I can read your thoughts, etc...you never know how your comments may help me out or someone else reading the comments.

GOALS: Things I am believing God will help me acccomplish within the next 28 days:

-That my moms health issues get dealt with quickly, and she has a speedy and full recovery!

-A full time job in TV production, that not only pays me what I am worth, but pays me more than I am worth, and can appreciate all of my talents, gits, and connections.
AND/OR
-I sell my TV Pilot and DVD ideas so I can be financially independent.

-I read my bible twice a day

-I pray for at least 30 minutes a day

-I get answers to lingering questions that specifically deal with issues in my personal life.

-That my daughter continues to improve in school and becomes at least a B student by the end of this school semester - I need the wisdom to motivate and encourage her, and the vision to see when she needs encouragement or motivation.

-That my book gets completed, and blows up!!!!

-That I go to the gym consistently and I actually see the changes in my physical appearance.

(I am sure that I will add more goals as I go along......)


TIME TO GET STARTED:
My goal was to just get this thing started. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED. I was really excited with the thought of actually putting myself out there. No more excuses. There is also a lot of pressure with me putting the microscope on my own life. I am confident that I can rise to overcome my challenges despite the pressure. I'm sure I will be embarrassed to write somethings. Some things will defiantely be difficult to share, however, I want this thing documented in real time, so there is no denying that God is going to move on my behalf.

Today-Monday February 2, 2008: Keri, my sisters 21st birthday!!!!!!!!
Goals
My goals are to make sure my sister know I love her and didn't forget her birthday, pray for fifteen minutes, read my bible in the morning and the evening with the help of my church's bible reading plan, play baskeball, watch a DVD of a church service, watch First Blood with my daughter, and not eat any sugar products.

I will check back in later to give you guys an update-I am certain God will give me a great way to accomplish one of my goals.

Challenges
Identifying and eliminating distractions.

What I'll be meditating or thinking about today:
Temptation is only an offer - offers can be refused!